author's note: This was written for a church Christmas party in 2005. Don't expect this year's story to be as good, I was on a roll with this.

The Innkeeper's Story

It was little noted that one of the greatest archaeological discoveries this year was a set of notes, found in an ancient garbage heap in Jerusalem dating back almost 2000 years. When translated it appeared to be the interview notes of St. Luke, the author of the Gospel of Luke in the Bible. It contained a section not found in the published gospel. Here is the translation:

It was almost dark when the couple came to my Inn near the outskirts of Bethlehem. It was a young man with his younger, and very pregnant, wife riding an overloaded donkey. They looked like a nice couple and it made me sorry that I wasn’t going to be of much use to them tonight.

I was sitting on my porch trying to block out the sounds of my guests inside – well, I say Guests but at least half of them were Aunts, Uncles, and third cousins-twice-removed, who had come to stay while waiting for their turn to deal with the Roman Officials and be Taxed and Counted for the Census. And the noise and the smell of so many well traveled bodies… well… lets just say a little night air was OK by me.

The young man smiled, it was a very engaging smile that made you like him almost instantly, but also somewhat enigmatic – like he was laughing to a joke that no one else could hear - and approached the stoop. “Greetings, I’m Joseph and this is my wife Mary. We’re on our way to a relative’s house on the other side of Bethlehem but we’ve had a long and difficult day on the road and I’m afraid she can’t travel any longer today.”

“Sorry friend,” I replied, and I truly was – no innkeeper worth his salt wants to give up on a paying guest, especially when he’s got a bunch of freeloaders inside eating him out of house and home. “I’m full up as I’ve never been full before. I’ve even had to double up my own room to fit everyone who needed a space. And before you ask, the stable is full and so is the yard. I’m up to here with goats, sheep, cows, donkeys, horses, you name it. There may even be a camel in there somewhere.”

Now you people hearing this might think I was being casual or callous, but not in the least. There is a game we play called Haggling where you tell me what you want, I tell you why you can’t get that, and then we go back and forth. In this case I knew I couldn’t give him a room, but I figured eventually we’d agree to help him set up a tent somewhere with some hot food for a reasonable price. Unfortunately we never got to that part of the negotiations because no sooner had we begun than Mary said something that brought everything to a crashing halt.

“Joseph,“ she said, “I think my water broke.”

At that moment three things happened at once – He said, “Huh?” I said, “What?” and my wife appeared in the doorway like an avenging angel.

She rushed to Mary’s side, “My Lands,” she exclaimed. “What are you doing? Don’t you know? She’s going to have a baby! Help her off this thing right now! You come this way, honey, nice and slowly. How do you feel? Don’t just stand there! Make a bed for her! Find my mother! Have the pains started? We are going to need some hot water and towels. Why aren’t you two moving?”

I was going to inquire where exactly we should put a lady about to give birth in an inn so full we were charging by the foot, but seeing the look in her eyes I decided that unless the Inn was going to burn down around her, I’d better just shut up. Instead I started walking to the stable. “C’mon,” I said to Joseph, “let’s start pulling those animals out. Guess you get the deluxe accommodations tonight. How are you at moving hay around?”

The next hour we were busy, busy, busy. While I led the animals out, Joseph, who it turns out was a Carpenter of all things, got some of the men to help him build a makeshift pen for them to sleep in. We shoveled and swept out the old straw and made a bed with a pile of fresh straw and blankets. When that was all ready, the women led the expectant mother in and we were evicted from the stable into the yard.

While I tended to the needs of the guests inside, Joseph sat on a small log near the entrance of the cave next to a small fire. He was passing the time by carving on a small piece of wood. Finally, the time came and the cry of a newborn baby was heard. The women came out and led Joseph back inside to be with his wife and child. And, because I had to be up early the next morning, I went to bed.

I went to bed, but for all the sleep I got that night I should have just stayed up. First off, that night a new star showed up in the sky. This wouldn’t have been so bad if it hadn’t decided to shine right in my eye, blinding me. Then, after I put a blanket over my window, some idiot choirmaster starts everyone singing at one o’clock in the morning!. The whole countryside echoed with Hallelujahs and Hosannas and Gloria and so loud that you couldn’t shut them out..

But that’s not all because after that had quieted down, an army of Shepherds came marching down the road and into my yard, and what a noise they made - tripping over things, stubbing their toes on posts, and disturbing the animals. And not just one group, after one would leave another would show up.

Eventually, I got curious and went out to see what was going on. Would you believe it, all this ruckus so they could spend a few seconds kneeling in front of a feed box being used as a crib? Mary was chatting softly with the people as they would come by and Joseph was whittling away and ignoring them all. At one point he looked up, saw me, and gave me a wave, and went back to his carving. I wanted to punch him in the mouth.

Finally, everyone had headed back to their sheep and I was able to go back to bed. And just as I was about to fall asleep… the rooster crowed and it was time to get up.

We didn’t see Joseph or Mary until that afternoon when they announced they were going to be pushing on to their final destination and we could get our stable back. As a token of gratitude they shared with us some of the gifts their visitors had left them – some dried fruit, a honeycomb, and a newly woven blanket.

As he was packing their things onto their donkey, Joseph called me over. “I noticed you were watching me whittle last night, would you like to see what I was making?” I said “Sure” and he showed me – it was a set of toys. There was a toy shepherd with a flock of wooden sheep, a small wooden saw and hammer, and finally a set of boards and twigs that he assembled into a replica of my little inn.

“You don’t know this, but this child is going to grow into a man with many jobs and who performs many roles to many people. For some he will be a Shepard, watching over them and gathering them in when they stray. For others he will be a Carpenter, and build them mansions in Heaven. And finally he will be an Innkeeper, giving shelter and rest to weary travelers as the walk down life’s road. These toys I have carved will help him learn how.”

“Well, that’s nice. Well worth losing a night’s sleep and being blinded in one eye for. Tell me, will you be passing this way again sometime?”

Joseph smiled his enigmatic smile, “Who knows? The future lives only in God’s hands.” It was then I decided to sell the inn and move to a nice summer resort on the Nile.

With that he finished his packing, then bidding us goodbye, he and his wife and newborn child walked down the road. We watched until they were out of sight, then my wife asked, “He paid you, right?”

One can only wonder why this marvelous and inspiring tale of the birth of the Christ Child was not included with the other Biblical accounts.


Mike Nebeker
2005