Chapter 1

As I begin writing my book, the story of my life, I ponder the nature of the chapter, why are chapters numbered? Why can't they be lettered?

I, I, something, what's the word I'm looking for?

I blank that people just take it for granted.

Fuck, I hate it when this happens, I'm in the middle of a sentence, and then I forget what I was saying, and I lose my train of thought, I just don't know how to continue, but I don't have to.

I could just slit my wrists, then I would never forget a word again, I would be at peace, and my faulty brain, my unremembered thoughts would cease to exist.

I know I'm over reacting, but that doesn't change that I want to do it, it just feels right, but I guess it's wrong.

Though what is wrong? It's the opposite of right, but so is left.

It seems unfair that "right" should have two yings to it's yang when "write" has none.

Or maybe "wrong" and "left" are the yang and they have to share a ying.

"Right" is a polygamist, and "write" is lonely, with opposite to keep it in check, it is unhindered and unburdened, maybe that's why all writers (or at least all good writers) are so crazy, they become one with their art and become just as unhinged as their verb of choice.

Where was I?

Oh yeah, my life story, I was born a poor bla—fuck, "assume", that's the word, awesome.

Is it "'assume'," or "'assume,'" I've gotten conflicting stuff on that, oh well, I'll worry about it later.

No, I was not born a poor black boy, that was Steve Martin in the Jerk, I was born a middle aged white boy, no, middle class, yeah that's it.

Maybe I was born middle aged, it would explain a lot, actually, it wouldn't.

Oh well, back to me.

Aww fuck it, I'm tired, I'll tell you later.

Night y'all.

We enter upon our hero, sitting in a chair typing into a message into a text box on an online message board, he types describing his actions, in the background plays a rap album (note to director: the album I suggest using is "The Inevitable Rise of Niggy Tardust!" by Saul Williams, in particular the song "Niggy Tardust".

HERO (V.O.)

As I sit here typing my actions and (now) my thoughts, I imagine my life on a screen, with a close up of my face, the sound is off and there are subtitles, Niggy Tardust in running.

*He looks around without moving his head, looks at the speaker followed by looking at the keyboard then returning to the screen, he makes and deletes a lot of typos as he types*


HEROINE (O.S.)

Hey, your name, what is the deal?
Spending your life way up there
Maybe it's time to get a little real
Take a break away from the computer


HERO

This is who I am
Change me you can try and fail
My life is only

What I make of it
It is all I have and need
Go away ad inf

Fade out

Fade in

Fade out

Fade in

Fade out

Fade in

Roll to credits, the credits read as follows:

Story by:

The Anonymous.

Screenplay by:

The Irrelevant

Directed by:

The Ramones

Cast

Hero … Himself
Heroine … Jone of Ourc[/list]

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It's bigger, it's there and it's bigger, the fourth dimension, it the same time, but it's more, it can't be, but it is, it exists where we are but it's more, are they better, are they kinder, are they smarter, do they shun our ignorance and stupidity, how can we live never knowing, even if we learned the truth, would we even care then.

I don't remember what I'm talking about, I should stop talking, but I won't, because I like hearing myself, even if it's only myself tack tack at the keyboard, my own thoughts, digital and parallel.

This is all I have to say, maybe the rest will come later.